just when my life begins to feel stagnate and predictable a large man enters my field of vision on a quiet sunday afternoon in hollywood. this man has pulled his pants down to expose his penis as he walks the length of highland ave. he looks sullen.
the scene plays out like this:
daphne and i are waiting at a stoplight just past hollywood and highland. i'm caught up in the sounds of bat for lashes (new girl crush) as we wait for the light to turn.
daphne: (paraphrasing) holy shit, that guy has his pants down.
i look to my left and sure enough this large, sad man is walking down the street holding his pants up to his mid-thigh.
lindsay: that's an odd choice of underwear...
daphne: uh, he's not wearing any underwear.
upon second glance i realize that what i thought what a g-string was actually the illusion caused by his rolls of fat and pubic hair. awesome.
we can't stop staring.
to make things better there's a family on his side of the street (3 kids, mom and dad) equally stunned by this man and his unmentionables. it was the most bizarre scene i've encountered in a while. i laughed for a solid 2 minutes after we left the scene.
what i wonder now is whether his exposure was a product of his sadness or if his sadness was a product of his exposure. it wasn't a particularly warm day so i can't imagine he was airing himself out. and (not to be cruel) his man parts were quite small...i don't imagine this was a walk of pride or showmanship.
his gloomy gait stayed with me long after the image of his penis evaporated from my memory. i hope he had some sort of destination. i hope there was a belt or new pair of pants at the end of his walk. and if freedom was his goal, i hope he found means of exposure that didn't leave him so downtrodden (or scar the eyes of little kids.)
maybe he was just hoping someone would stop him and tell him his was good enough. maybe he was tired of the push and pull of love and sex and decided to present his goods to potential partners before his heart got involved.
ignoring the logic that he was probably just crazy...it makes me wonder how close we all come to a heartbroken walk through hollywood with ourselves exposed. while i'm speaking metaphorically...is it really so hard to believe that any one of us could be that guy and his sad genitalia?
actually, yes it is. but i really wanted to give this guy some credit. he looked like a guy that needed someone batting for him for once. and who doesn't want to pull metaphors out of bizarre scenes in hollywood? i know i do!
big, sad, penis man...i hope you found what you're looking for.
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1 comment:
We need more naked people.
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