iPhoto wants me to dwell (August 07)

so tonight i was trying to find a certain picture in my sea of 3000+ photos in iPhoto and decided to have a go at the Trash folder. i had never done this before. and it seems this folder had not been cleaned out since it's creation back in 2002.

holy shit.

my trash folder has 500 photos in it. that's a nice round number. and among these 500 pictures are all the bad angles, awkward relationships, and not-important-enough-to-be-saved moments of the last 5 years of my life. and until now my memory functioned under the impression these moments were effectively gone. but no. iPhoto is much too careful. it knows how indecisive i am. and for 5 years i felt mistakenly triumphant in my decision to erase these sordid pieces of "film." but now iPhoto is laughing in my face. now, do i delete them permanently or once again go over these events and re-remember why i wanted to forget them in the first place?

(of course i went back through them.)

the contents of my trash folder fascinates me. much of them are poor pictures i took of myself. (narcissist.) many are of a person i definitely intended to forget. and the rest are tiny pieces of my life i didn't want. if only it were that easy to get rid of excess emotional crap. even then i'm sure there would eventually be a "trash folder" ready to bring it all back up. (i really wanted to make it all a metaphor. i couldn't resist.)

to summarize i thought i'd share one of the abandoned photographs:


brilliant.
there's so much to be said about pictures that weren't worth saving. and what's not in that folder says so much as well.

blows my freaking mind.

oh, and i never found that picture. sucks.